Last night, I talked to my mom about my anxiety. This might not seem like much, but it's taken a lot to open up to her about what's going on in my head. She said she's noticed that she's noticed that I've been getting "bad," just based on the hints I'd been giving her. She has talked to my dad about me seeing a doctor, and he thinks I need to talk to my priest, outside of confession (I'm Orthodox, for those who don't know). I've talked to Father about it, and I've taken his advice and prayed about it, and it has helped. My mother thinks I need to talk to a doctor, and I agree. However, I'm hesitant. I afraid that they will have me shove my face full of pills instead of actually fixing the problem. I'm also afraid that I don't actually have a problem and it's just my hormones being shitheads, My mom said that she understands, but she thinks I still need to talk to a doctor. What do you think I should do? I need help.

Hey everyone! I'm so so so sorry I haven't updated in almost a year. My laptop broke and I hated the format of this website on my phone. But I'm back now, so yay!

Life has been very hectic the last couple months. First, I went out on my first date, which was absolutely amazing. We went to see X-Men: Apocalypse, and then we went and got dinner. The rest of the summer was good. After the beginning of the school year, stuff kinda went down hill for awhile. My good friend got a new girlfriend, and that was good, but a lot of drama happened and then they broke up. After that, his depression got worse and worse and worse until he was finally put on observation at a hospital here in town. He was gone for about a week, and then he came back. He was on meds, and he was better, not perfect, but better, for awhile. Then it got really bad again and attempted suicide. I didn't know where he was, if he was okay, or anything. I was terrified that he was dead and I hadn't been there to help. I found out that he is okay and doing residential treatment in OKC. That was the best news I had in awhile. I've been praying for him and thoughts and prayers would be appreciated.
It was a rough couple weeks, especially with school and stuff. This week was the best week I've had in a very, very long time. Friday, I went out with three of my favorite people, then Saturday I hung out with my best friend, Sparrow, all day. I also found out that she was asked out by someone she has liked for a very long time. It made me over the moon happy because, A) I was right, B) she is over the moon happy, and C) the boy who asked her out is another good friend of mine, and he's happy. There are a couple things I'm worried about though. First, I'm worried that Sparrow will get hurt, and as often as I tell this boy to fight me, I don't actually want to hurt him. Second of all, as childish and selfish as it might seem, I'm scared I'll be gradually replaced. It's stupid and selfish, I know that, but it's one of my greatest fears. I don't want to be replaced and I don't want either of them to get hurt. Well, things will happen as they will. All I can do is pray and trust Sparrow. With that, I bid you adieu.

Killjoys, make some noise.